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Will Bringing Boobs Back Save E3?

What was once the largest convention in the nation for all things gaming, the Electronic Entertainment Expo (E3) has been slowly dying out in the last two years. With their elitist invite-only basis and “no-nonsense” approach, they brought in a mere 3-5,000 people compared to the previous 60,000 hungry gaming gurus that flocked to the event when it didn’t require an invitation.

Why were they hungry a few years ago, you ask? The answer is clear.

Booth babes.

But that wasn’t all; in 2006 there was a party in E3’s pants and we were all invited. That meant independent gaming companies, bloggers, columnists and all the “little guys” of the gaming industry were considered worthy of attending. The event was all about big that year. Companies spent massive amounts of money to display huge pyrotechnic shows, large concerts and big boobs.

A 1-story tall screen, a rock band, and a hot belly dancer who could breathe fire.

What went wrong:
In 2007 the people at E3 decided that the “little guys” were no longer welcome and devised a strict invite-only policy. Independent developers were shut out and overturned for bigger companies which seriously hurt their chances of survival in the gaming world. E3 did away with most of the press and the infamous “booth babes.” were also not on the list. This was the response of the public:

Attendance of E3 Slashed after new invite-only policy

It was clear that E3’s new structure of “professionalism” wasn’t going to work out, yet they kept at it another year while the attendance rate at the PAX Convention in Seattle soared to new heights.

Today, Dan Hewitt, the senior director for communications at E3 said we can expect “glamour, sizzle and excitement” that obviously went missing the last couple years. Yes, the booth babes will return. No, we’re still not invited.

I’ve had a few rare encounters with the elusive “booth babe.” They definitely serve their purpose; most times I’ve met one I’ve had to stand in a mile long line. Heads definitely turn. Why wouldn’t they? They’re like little Vanna Whites with skimpier clothing and nice assets.

I have the same opinion about babes as the guy in the background of that photo. Though boobs will be big this year, it may not be enough. Independent developers have already gone elsewhere, as have the press. Since most booth babes know of a “console” being something they do when a friend is sad, it might come in handy when they have to console the people at E3 as they realize that bringing back the boobs won’t save them from a slow and painful death.